The Question: Why?

Sunday, 02 September 2012

The Question: Why?

I was asked the question today for the first time. The Question. The BIG Question that I expect to be asked every single time I tell our story.

The Child, that beautiful, scared, little boy, he has a few behaviors that are typical signs of Autism.

We were not sure, in our hearts, that He could be on the Autism Spectrum until we had requested his information and , in my heart, had already committed to him. Ultimately, I was sure about moving forward on this child before we knew about these behaviors.

Today was the first time i mentioned these behaviors to anyone other than Ch and a very close friend who also has children on the spectrum.

I was telling my Mom about the behaviors.

She listened quietly, nodding.

Then she asked it.

The Question.

"Why would you want to adopt a child with Autism?"

My heart stopped beating for a second. I had to take a deep breath. And it is a very good thing that, just last night, my very close friend and I had discussed this question and what my answer would be .

"Something about This Child is special. He feels important to me. I've felt strongly about him for over a month and when we decided to move forward and request his information we didn't know that he has Autism. Once we got the description, we discussed the behaviors. We discussed the resources. We discussed what his life must have been like thus far, growing up in a setting with constant over stimulation, Adult attention run thin, and absolutely no help from anyone who knows how to teach a child with Autism how to navigate through the world. And we prayed. We talked. We prayed. And I still felt just as strongly about him. It's not his fault where he was born. It's not his fault the parents he was born to. It's not his fault that is has Autism. We are choosing to accept the Autism as just part of who he is. We didn't set out saying to ourselves, 'Let's adopt a kid with autism!' We said, 'Let's work toward THIS child.' And he just happens to have Autism."

"You're not even interested in looking for a different child then?" She asked.

"We are only interested in him."

She nodded again. "He must be very special, indeed."

Yes. I think he must be.