Sunday, 17 June 2012
-
Exclusion: Twice in two weeks
I’m so disappointed, upset and angry that I found myself writing this.
Little man has now been excluded for the second time in 2 weeks. It’s outrageous that a pupil on the autism spectrum and with educational needs is being treated in such a disgraceful manner. It is now in my opinion that this is discrimination only problem is proving it.
Reasons given for his exclusion as stated in letter from the Head teacher:
- Being foul and abusive to both children and adults.
- Being severely disruptive in class
- upsetting children.
- Dangerously throwing playground equipment about.
- Refusing to follow instructions from a range of adults of adults.
The exclusion will be for the fixed period of 2.5 days commencing from Thursday 18th March and ending on Tuesday 23rd March. During this time it is my responsibility to make sure little man doesn’t enter onto school premises ( hard considering he has a younger sister I need to take and collect from school ) I am also not allowed to be seen to have him in any public place during school hours. Regardless of his exclusion if found to be in a public place with or without me I could face the prospect of a £50 fine. What a disgrace. Not only must my son miss important education but also remain on house arrest why doing so! Then their is me. Am I supposed to put my life on hold with every exclusion? Do they forget that I’m a mother of not one child but indeed three. My youngest is just three months old. Clinic appointments are a must.
I felt that when I arrived to collect little man the Head teacher failed to discuss his reasons for exclusion in a reasonable manner. I found the conversation to be rushed and unsympathetic. Understanding is needed that way better behaviour management techniques can be used resulting in little man remaining in school. I’m the mother of a child that is expressing unwanted behaviour in school and the staff within school lack understanding and due to this I feel as if I can’t make plans or go to far in case I am needed to collect little man if these problems arise. Then once home I’m then expected to stay in doors in the fear of being fined. Where is the right in this? You can a least have the decency to look at me, and not rush a conversation that I find important. This is my son’s education and your not taking it serious! I told the Head teacher who at the time had a TA with him that I would expect the reasons for exclusion in a letter by the end of the school day. He had already briefly told me ( leaving out the dangerously throwing playground equipment out ) but I understood this to be my right and his obligation as a head teacher. I didn’t want to take chances with this school given the past. The Head teacher had also had me collect little man on two other occasions. I wasn’t aware of mine and little mans rights at the time and being upset with the situation I just did what I felt was expected of me. It was after contacting ACE that I discovered It was illegal to send little man home without pursuing the relevant regulations. It turns out this was called unofficial exclusion. Regardless of parent consent it was still not lawful. This made me feel like he had taken advantage given that he knew I didn’t know the laws surrounding exclusions. It was this incident that pushed me into educating myself on the guidance on exclusions and the SEN code of practice. I also started reading the laws regarding disability rights.
When we left little man told me what had happened. He said he was to miss some off morning break and half hour of lunch break. For being rude to a member of staff the previous day. Didn’t they see removing him from breaks as punishment was not working. The unwanted behaviour he was showing was getting worse not better. It was my feeling that inclusion within school wasn’t happening. I felt it to be more for the benefit of playground assistants due to them not being able to cope with challenging behaviour. This to me is a form of discrimination it has to be. The decision to remove him from breaks and class was something that was happening on a daily basis. It was easy to see that he seriously struggled to cope with unstructured time. presumably due to difficulties with sensory overload, his environment, frustrations with lack of order. It’s clear to see that intervention is needed to assess his needs and work on discovering what triggers his challenging behaviour. Strategies are then needed to help avoid meltdowns before they have occurred.
But this was not it! The worse was still to come. Little man explained that when he stopped running way he was speaking to the Head teacher who was ordering him to go to his office when a TA run up behind him and grabbed him. The Head said good job as he took his legs and they both carried him from the busy playground to the Head teachers office. He said he felt silly as the children laughed. He waved at them as he was carried as he didn’t want them to think he was sad. But he was sad and he was scared that if he tried to get away they may hold him tighter and he would get hurt. He said he told the Head and TA once in the office that mum would be cross as they grabbed him. Apparently little man was given a shocking response when he replied WELL GIOVANNI YOU LIKE TELLING STORIES. Now can you imagine my anger.This was emotional abuse. I was appalled that a pupil Aspergers or NT could be treated in such a disgusting way. I phoned to be told he was at lunch. I continued calling with no success. When I collected the letter at the end of the day he was still unavailable. The avoidance just made me more upset. Then when I saw that one of the listed reasons was dangerously throwing playground equipment. I knew they were attempting to cover themselves. Little man admitted to all listed reasons for exclusion but this one he strongly deny. I also remember that when I collected little man from school this was not a reason that the Head had listed to me in our conversation. It was pretty easy to remember this given that the conversation was short, rude and unhelpful. Even if he had thrown things in the playground why restrain and carry him to the office when he was stood speaking with the Head I see no danger there! And secondly why have you chosen to not tell me about it?
I am still waiting to hear from the Head. It looks like my concerns will have to wait till we meet on Monday to discuss little mans return to school. In the meantime I have emailed and written to the LEA, Educational Welfare Officer, Governing body, Exclusion officer.
I also plan on contacting local newspaper and radio. The sooner the LEA make a decision as to whether a statutory assessment is needed the better. Provisions need to be put into place in order for little man to receive the educational and emotional support he needs. If this means moving him to a school better suited to his needs then well be it.
RecommendRelated Posts
Post a Comment
- Back to autisable's Autisable Site!
- Note: your comment will appear in autisable's local time zone: GMT -05:00 (Eastern Standard - US, Canada)
About the Author
-
- From: aboywithaspergers
- Name: aboywithaspergers
- Location:
- About Me: A british mother of three children, one in which has a diagnosis of Aspergers. This blog is created as a place for me to share my journey and views on parenting a child on the autism spectrum.
Stats: This Week All Time Posts: 0 101 Views: 0 102297 Comments: 0 195 View all posts by aboywithaspergers
Comments (8)
I had a friend like that growing up, and he got to go to a special school and had a better time there. He's the one that locked me in a cage in a basement threw a bicycle and told me that boys are better and stronger than girls. He calmed down a lot once he went away. Sometimes, kids get pressured and that makes them lash out. It's typical to blame the behavior and not look for a cause. It could just be maladaption on both sides or his disorder and he might, indeed, be better suited somewhere that understands him.
No child should be treated like that, or feel sad and scared like you described especially not because of a member of staff had been emotionally abusing him. I'd move him to a better school ASAP if I were you. He shouldn't grow up in a school like this where he's being treated badly by unsympathetic people aren't very understanding.
I am SO sad reading this because it reminds me of my own son and I know this is what is in his future... Good for you for contacting all of those agencies and folks. When we found ourselves in a similar situation, I even contacted our governor's office. Don't stop until your child is safe!!!
I also agree with both comments listed above... please hear me out before screaming for agreeing with comment #1. I'm not saying your child should be "sent to a special school," what I agree is that "he might be better suited somewhere that understands him." I also agree with comment #2 in that "staff has been emotionally abusing him. I'd move him to a better school ASAP... he shouldn't grow up in a school like this where he's being treated badly by unsympathetic people." This is the crossroads our family is facing: new school, private school, move all together? It's the awful reality of raising a child with ASD in a world where so few folks really understand (no matter what their training has been). Like Dr. Temple Grandin says:
I cannot emphasize enough the importance of a good teacher.
Temple Grandin
Some teachers just have a knack for working with autistic children. Other teachers do not have it.
Temple Grandin
My son has been excluded unnecessarily as well and we kept him home until the school had a behavior intervention plan that we felt was acceptable. Yes, my husband and I almost lost our jobs for taking the time off, but he's our child and we have to keep him both physically and emotionally safe. In our case, the school staff was still willing to work at making it work. Unfortunately, when you reach the point that the child is resented, or even loathed, for requiring so much adult/teacher assistance, you have to really consider if it's worth fighting to keep the child there. I will keep you in my prayers!
Blessings!
DC
What kind of horrible school does your child go to? No child should ever be treated like that. I've never even heard of exclusion, I don't think we have it here, but it sound obnoxious and doesn't it infringe on your rights, if you can't go out in public with him during school hours? On school grounds is one thing, but I don't think schools should have any input into what goes on outside of school.
Does your school have like EPA's (they are workers trained to handle students with disabilities, who work with students both in and outside of the classroom setting). The elementary/junior high school I went to had a giant learning center that specialized in disabilities (mental/learning and physical), lots of people moved to that area or made arrangements for their children to go there if they had disabilities.
I hope your son is treated better in the future, and good for you for sticking up for him! Good luck.
why are they picking him up and carrying him to the office? that's humiliating and unnecessary. it sounds like you should get him in a school that is better for your little man, a magnet school perhaps? it's free unlike private schools and they are significantly better than public schools. i went to a magnet school from 6th-8th grade and it was fantastic!
"I am also not allowed to be seen to have him in any public place during school hours. Regardless of his exclusion if found to be in a public place with or without me I could face the prospect of a £50 fine."
what the fuck is that????? they CANNOT do that. house arrest is strictly for legal purposes, i'm pretty sure that stupid school doesn't have a right to do that to you.
Is he in a regular UK state school? If so, maybe you should look in to sending him to a school better suited for his needs. There are plenty of schools in England more suited to children with aspergers. I know you might see this as discrimination, but it's also possible that the school doesn't know how to manage a child like your son. Most teachers aren't trained to handle children with mental or physical disabilities/handicaps unless they specifically go into special needs training. I'm not trying to take the side of the school here, but if it's not a school specifically for children with aspergers and other learning difficulties, it's entirely possible that they just don't know how to deal with him. Good luck!
@dead_poetic009xx@xanga - yeah, actually, they can do that. It's to stop kids getting kicked out of school and being allowed to roam the streets causing trouble. If they've been expelled or they're suspended from school, they can't just walk the streets doing nothing, they have to be kept at home, it's UK law.
It's sad when teachers fail to understand the child and punish unneccessarily. I was treated like that and carried out the classroom when I was young for 'not listening' to the teacher, literally carried out of the classroom by two of the teachers.
I'm not autistic but I didn't know much english at the time, and even though my mother had previously informed the school of this, the teachers failed to act accordingly and instead felt fit to punish instead of understand.
Thankfully, I got a nose-bleed which got me sent to the office, where the receptionist and headteacher were very kind to me. I feel so sorry for your child...it seems he's in a similar situation except that the headteacher is not understanding either.
I think you're taking the right approach in going to the paper and making a fuss about this. It is not right for your child to be treated in this way. Teachers should understand that your child is acting this way for a reason, and they should try and be caring and positive rather than just punishing him for acts rather than addressing the root cause. In my opinion though it'd be a good idea to have him move schools, it seems as if the staff at your current school will just treat your child scornfully even if you manage to fix this problem.
@daydreams_nightmares@xanga - wow wtf...so glad i don't live there that's bullshit. you can't keep someone under house arrest for doing something bad at school. i thought america was fucked up....guess not.