Thursday, 02 February 2012
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Forced Friendships
Yesterday, I wrote about how I'd lost a friend, and the effort I'd put into getting her back. I kind of think this has something to do with how I was forced to have friends when I was little due to being in special ed. I feel like I have to be someone's friend. I was taught that way.
Part of my IEP was social interaction because I didn't seem interested.
The reason I wasn't interested was because nobody was interested in me since I was "special." Everyone knew that I was the "nowhere" kid, destined. I wish that my teachers and other people would have realized that I sat alone for a reason and not forced me to socialize with people that were just polite.
My sister once asked, "if they're your friends, how come they never call?"
For the most part, I didn't really have friends. I had people who pretended to be to be nice.
Any of you guys experience this? Are your children forced to hang with peers that couldn't care less about them for the sake of a piece of paper?
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- From: Colorsofthenight@xanga
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Comments (6)
My mom used to and still does even (at age 23) pressure me to get along with people, even those who are mean. Be nice be nice be nice. Like, KISS MY ASS I've had enough. It made me feel like a failure when I couldn't (often) sustain friendships because people just plain didn't like me. I still have a nagging feeling of rejection after I repeatedly try to be friends and already know it's a lost cause. I am working on trusting my intuition more. It is my guiding light.
@DrummingMediocrity@xanga - My mother is like that. I just don't care about what she says. Why should I care about people that don't care about me?
@tsukiouji@xanga - I had to serve those people.
@DrummingMediocrity@xanga - yes, utopia has to end for there to be happiness.
I find it easier to make friends online, but they aren't really close friends. I live in a very isolated place (an island) and there aren't that many people here, only one or two, quite literally, who like me. I'm quite lonely, but that's how it is.
@tsukiouji@xanga - My mother cares a lot about me and and I know that the pressure comes from a place of love. If you know your mother doesn't care about you, I hope you have more evidence than that. Most mothers love their kids due to biological intrusion on our brains during birth. I shouldn't say "our" because I'm a single, childfree female (hopefully the latter for ever), but you got the point. It's a woman thing, I think.