Saturday, 16 April 2011
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Cure ignorance, not autism.
Cure ignorance, not autism. I thought it should go without saying, but apparently I was wrong, so I will say it now: People with autism (adults and children) deserve to be treated with the same level of dignity as everyone else. That's not to say that people without autism are consistently treated with dignity, either, but that's another issue that I can't begin to touch here.
So, how do you treat a person with autism?
Respect our differences! Please, quit trying to strip us of every little thing that makes us autistic. Who cares if I stim when I'm alone in my apartment? Heck, who cares if I do it sometimes in public? It's part of who I am; leave it alone. Maybe, instead of getting rid of the stimming, you can look at whyI'm stimming and try to change whatever is making me uncomfortable.
Do NOT talk down to us. In my research study, all of the researchers talk to us like we're children. Now, I'll give you that in many ways, I am a child... but they speak to us in a way that I don't even talk to my friend's 2-year-old. I am a highly intelligent human being... I would venture to say that most of us in the study are more intelligent than the researchers themselves... please, treat me like the intelligent person that I am.
Involve us in decisions about us. Whether it's a behavior plan or a living situation or a huge, nationwide organization that seeks a cure for autism, we deserve to be involved in these decisions.
Respect our limitations. It's immensely frustrating to be told that I'm making it up or to get over it when I can't do something.
Back to the cure issue... first of all, don't assume that it's either good or bad. Some people want a cure and some do not. However, the way to go about finding a cure is certainly not to research prenatal testing. Why? Well, if a parent finds out that her baby-t0-be will have autism... how many will abort? Right. Not the way to do it. This world needs people with autism.
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About the Author
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- From: autisticspeaks
- About Me: I'm 22, a Christian, and a recent college grad with usually-high-functioning autism, though it depends on the day. I'm trying to figure out how I can live the life I've dreamed of with autism in it. The photo is from Disney World, right before we went on the Safari... possibly the most excited I've ever been in my life!
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Comments (6)
I am not trying to cure YOU. I would like a cure for my son, diagnosed with Autistic Disorder, assessed with profound developmental delays, who does not have your intellectual or communication skills as demonstrated in your comment. You do not speak for my son when you say stop trying to cure "us". Do not pretend you do. Thank you.
The point of the matter is, you're just like everyone else. Society tries to change everyone else. Society as a whole disrespects everyone else. Society is not made for anyone. Society is made for everyone, and therefore accommodating anyone is way too much for anyone else.
Society sucks balls for anyone who doesn't go with the flow, whether that person willing chooses to be different or is just made different.
That's life.
I can see both sides here. Personally, I want a cure for my daughter. I want her to be a fully functional person who can make a good income, her own decisions and look after herself well. That will not happen without intensive intervention that many of the "ND" movement would term 'trying to change us." At the same time, I see that some of her behaviors are not going to hurt herself or anyone else and are just a part of who she is. At her school, I see the teachers focusing on things that a just part of her quirkiness not her ability to cope with the world. For example, she likes to skip when the teacher is walking her out to the car. So who cares? Why can't she skip out to the car as long as she's not running away or being disruptive? For some reason, they've got to set an incentive so that she walks "like a big girl." Baloney! She's 5 years old. She's not a big girl, so why does she have to walk like one? There are other behaviors that I don't think should be of concern, yet I see them putting time and energy into changing them. On the other hand, I believe there are many things that she needs to change for her to have a decent shot in life. Like any parent of any child, I just want my kid to be happy and self-reliant.
Wow! My son has autism and adhd, but just because he is high functioning. He is told he is normal! But his social skills is something that needs to improve. It's society that is making it hard for children/adults like him to fit in. What is normal? If your child had visual disabilities would be a different story. Not all children/adults will improve. Depends on where your child is on the spectrum. I face ignorance from all angles, because I am too look the victim. My son has no friends, finds it hard to control himself, likes his own company and expected to keep still and to listen. These strategies have not been put in place only to recently. He is 8 now, but on his own no problem, in a crowds, the noise, bright places make him go out of control. Each child is unique, got to learn to embrace. The earlier it is caught the better for each child, I guess. But I am open minded to all parents/carers, I love my son the way he is...
@autisticspeaks, I hear you and respect what you had to say. As a parent of a 5yo high functioning ASD who doesn't fit the 'norm' we are placed under so much pressure to get our kids to conform with the 'norm'. But really he is happy and highly intelligent. I am so proud of who he is and support him in his continued development whatever path he wants to take as long as he is happy. It's just society can't handle anything that is different.
Please as a parent look at you kid and decide if they are happy regardless don't change them. It's who they are and be proud of what you have. Don't change them to fit into the 'norm' because you feel uncomfortable in your interactions with society with your kid. Love them for all their quirks and support them in their strengths. Yes, we support our kid to harness a normal so call life with many dr's & specialist therapy but really these are aids not a cure. He doesn't need curing he is extraordinary I wouldn't want to dumb him down.
autisticspeaks, you are special and deserved to be treated with respect. You just need to forgive the naive society in which we live. No one can change you, you have full control and if your control is to sometimes slip into your comfort zone and vent ad hoc behaviours that is not the 'norm' who cares if it's the normal for the 'so called normal people'. If you are happy and obviously you preserve under stress and pressure hold you head up high and continue cause like my son I wouldn't change him for all his quirks. He is more special to me in so many other ways and I know in his future he will make his mark as long as he can do it on his own terms.
@AutismRealityNB - Agreed. I have just become a member of this site, and already, want to leave! I am so frustrated with so many people being "labeled" Autistic in our society. True, they may have other "issues" such as OCD, Behavioral, Tactile, etc., but SHOULD NOT be labeled Autistic. Like your son, my son has AUTISM. He will be turning 17 in July and can't even cross the street by himself, let alone have his own apartment, hold a job, and create compositions such as these! I am sick of this society, and all the medical "professionals" putting the label of Autism on people that are not. Diagnose them as they should be, OCD, Manic/Depressive, Schizophrenic, etc., but not Autism. Yes, some autistic children and young adults have these "issues" which compound their Autism, but those symptoms do not make someone truly autistic. Not only have I been a mother to my son for 17 years, but I have also taught children with special needs for 20 years.