Saturday, 05 March 2011

  • My daughter probably has a learning disability




    I am happy to report that so far this week is going exponentially better than last.  Big Brother is back home and doing much better.  His meds were tweaked, along with his attitude, and it looks like we'll be getting some in-home help again to hopefully keep him on track.

    That said, I'm mad.  Steaming mad.

    Recently, we had Twin Sister evaluated for possible learning difficulties.  No matter how hard she tries, she is struggling so badly in school, we felt it was time to look into the whys.

    This is not the first time she was evaluated.  Far from it.

    We started our journey of diagnosis roulette back in third grade.  Her very perceptive teacher had concerns about her attention and her ability to grasp math.  She was referred for testing and promptly declared "perfectly average" by the IEP team.

    Continued behavioral issues lead us to another series of evaluations that landed her their respective diagnoses:  ADHD, Bipolar, Generalized Anxiety Disorder.

    All the while she struggled through school.  Conferences were always filled with examples of how she missed the mark, yet had a great attitude and tried so hard.  Even though her grades were not good, she always managed to pass.  So our concerns about her performance were continually met with the same reassurance.

    "She's right where she should be."

    The teachers may have bought into this.  Same with the administration.  And, although we had those nagging doubts, we even went along with it.  The only one not on board was my girl.

    Over the years her self esteem plummeted.  She thought she was dumb.  She'd cry and ask why she got a 68% on a test, and was perplexed when her teacher told her she did "fine."  To her, the message was loud and clear. 

    "That's the best you can do."

    Today, we found some answers.  But with each discovery came a whole host of other questions.

    You see, she has problems with visual processing.  She can't adequately take in visual input, including numbers and other symbols.  And her grasp of written language -- its construction and her ability to find the right words --is also problematic.  Terms like Visual Processing Disorder and Non Verbal Learning Disability were tossed around.  But of course no definitive diagnosis.  That would require further evaluation. Oh brother!

    With all this information, you may be wondering what has gotten my goat so badly.  After all, I have answers.

    Don't get me wrong.  The answers are great. But quite frankly the timing sucks.

    My daughter is in seventh grade.  That means that she has been in school for almost eight years.  And in all that time, only one teacher had enough guts to speak up about her performance.  The others just pushed her through, not taking the time or energy to question why this extremely bright child was having such a tough time of it.

    Even when she was tested, the SPED staff was all to quick to discount any of her difficulties, chalking them up to immaturity or socializing or disorganization.  When all else failed, they just blamed the parents.  We needed to keep her up with her homework, work harder on her multiplication facts or make sure she was reading the prescribed book every evening.

    In the end I am just floored that with all the talk of Response to Intervention, No Child Left Behind and all the other platitudes our there, that my child continued to fall through the cracks.  And I can't help but wonder how many others there are like her out there. There is something seriously wrong with an educational system that turns a blind eye to this.

    My daughter probably has a learning disability.  Who knew?  And that's what's so disturbing.

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  • raisingcomplicatedkids
    • From: raisingcomplicatedkids
    • Name: Accidental Expert
    • About Me: I'm a stay-at-home mom with four children -- a teenager, a todder and tween twins. Adding to our normal chaos is the fact that my twins have been categorized as complicated. My son has Aspergers Syndrome and Bipolar, and his twin sister Bipolar with ADHD. Over the years I have learned more than I ever thought possible about these condition -- and that's how I got my name. Visit my blog http://accidental expert.blogspot.com and join us in my journey with my quirky, wonderful complicated kids.
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