We have had concerns about Firstborn for a while now, particularly in the last year or so. He seems so far ahead in some ways and yet so 'not at the level of an 8 year old' in others, i.e. epic tantrums. I took him as he was, thinking all children were like that. His issues did not seem to be resolving themselves as he grew older and I began to question it more when HRH was diagnosed with autism.
Our biggest concern for the last 2.5 years has been school. He finds school very frustrating. He does ok until around about this time of the year. He holds it together because he is learning enough new information to keep him motivated, just about. But the revision of the years work will begin shortly and it is the worst time of year for us. By May it will be an enormous battle every single day to get him to go to school. He will sit in class and do his 'attitude' thing and then bring it home to share with us *sigh* and the epic tantrums will increase significantly.
Don't get me wrong. He is a
great child. He is funny, bright, thoughtful and great company. He can be daft sometimes and forgets things like needing shoes to go outside or leaves for school without his schoolbag. A bit of a feather head then, but not too much. He is only 8! His biggest negative attribute is impatience, I have high hopes that he will learn over the years, but as he is very much a mini-me I think I am wishing on a star there.
It was the parent of a gifted child we know who suggested that this could be our issue as her son and my son seemed so alike, sharing many uncanny similarities with school, tantrums and more. However, it took me a year (with many, many requests) to get the results of Firstborns standardized tests from the school. Without those results we couldn't pursue the EA (Exceptionally Able) route.We couldn't arrange proper assessments until we knew his scores in comparison to other children his age.
Now, finally, we have have the results of further private assessments. He has assessed as gifted which is defined
here:
"the general understanding appears to be that a gifted child is one whose potential in one or more areas would place him or her in the top 2 to 5% of children of the same age." I prefer the term 'Exceptionally Able' (EA) myself, I like that, it doesn't have the same baggage attached as 'Gifted' (you know those mothers who say their children are geniuses, that's not me).
I have been doing some reading on this excellent website
www.giftedkids.ie. We have enrolled him in some Saturday courses (Japanese and Photography) for children his age with exceptional ability. He is hugely excited about attending and the subjects were his choice. This will give us some breathing space to get our heads around the fact that he has special education requirements and that we will be on our own with this. HRH gets educational support because he has autism, Firstborn will get no help whatsoever, there are no accelerated learning programmes in schools here. That feels a bit daunting at the moment.
One of the myths surrounding EA children is that they are set for life and will coast through school, need no help or support. This is not true, it is more likely they will underperform in school due to boredom and frustration (luckily it hasn't reached that stage for us). These children are also more prone to low self-esteem as they find it difficult to relate to their peers and become isolated.
The Saturday courses will also gives us time to get over the 'how did I not know' phase and learn more about him from this new perspective. I mean look, this was written for him:
Characteristics of the Gifted and Talented Child
- Keen powers of observation.
- Learned or read very early, often before school age.
- Reads widely and rapidly.
- Well developed vocabulary - takes delight in using unusual and new words.
- Has great intellectual curiosity.
- Absorbs information rapidly - often called sponges.
- Very good memory - can recall information in different circumstances.
- Have ability to concentrate deeply for prolonged periods.
- Very good powers of reasoning and problem solving.
- Have intense interests.
- Possess unusual imagination.
- Have a great interest in "big" questions, e.g. the nature of the universe, the problem of suffering in the world, environmental issues.
- Very sensitive - perhaps getting upset easily.
- Very concerned about rights and wrongs, concerned about injustices.
*facepalm*Read original post
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Comments (1)
sad story :(