After having a few days to mull over Big Brother's IEP meeting, I realize there are some things that stuck with me. Yes, it was a good meeting overall, but over I've come to realize I hit the same mindset that I encounter year after year.
"He doesn't come to class prepared."
"We put the material on the board, but he doesn't write it in his planner"
"If I let him off too easily how will he learn?"
And my personal favorite:
"Why won't he tell us when he needs a break."
It doesn't seem to matter how much literature they're given, how many meeting we have, how many tests they're shown, the result is eerily familiar. Heads nod with understanding, I see's are uttered, but -- and this is a big but --in the end.the mindset remains the same. When push comes to shove, the expectation is that these kids on the spectrum -- who appear so normal to the naked eye -- should be able to do what those around them do. If not, it is often seen as a matter of willfulness, of manipulation or just being downright lazy.
How can I say this? Easy. Phrases like "he's digging his heels in", "he could do it when he wants to" or "he's just not trying" are dead give-aways. They reveal the lack of understanding that my child's problem is based in neurology, in wiring -- and not in conscious choice.
I always find myself surprised, that in this day and age, so many educators truly don't understand autism. They say they do. But when you think about it how can they?
Its hard enough for us parents, who live it every day, to understand the many complexities that make up our kids. Even experts can't agree on causes and successful interventions. Then comes that fact that each child is so unique, there is no one strategy that will suite them all.
Add to that the fact that most teachers and special education professionals never even studied spectrum disorders and you have a recipe for disaster. Many a seasoned teacher finds themselves in a situation where techniques that have been tried and true for years fail to reach this strange, foreign child. And since they have been so successful for so long, the response is to not question the strategy, but blame the child.
I used to think that the solution was awareness. But now I realize that's only the beginning. I've come to believe that biggest job requirement is a love for the work.
I'll be the first to admit that my boy is not the easiest to deal with. Anyone who teaches him must who appreciate his many quirks.. Understand the motivations behind the seemingly bizarre actions. And truly enjoys my son not in spite of his challenges, but because of them.
In the end I guess I question whether it is fair to insist on inclusion and mainstreaming. What good is it to be in a class where the teacher is forced to handle an autistic child? You run the risk of fostering resentment instead of learning. It is unfair to think that all educators will be good teachers to our kids, just as it is unfair to think that all teachers should be expected to teach second grade.
As for solutions, I don't know. At the end of a long evening, I'm just putting a lot of my rambling ideas out there as thoughts to ponder.
Recommend
Comments (6)
I wish your ramblings were an official report I could hand to Sky's teachers at his next IEP.
I have to tell you that the best educational setting for my children was a collaborative classroom. There was always a special education teacher at the ready and they had taken seminars about autism if they had had no experience with the disability. Interestingly over the years I could count on one hand, removing the thumb and the pinky in counting, the number of teachers that did not ask for my input. But those that did not ask were the kind that would not accept that they did not know the answers, so they blamed everyone but themselves for the failures, including the child. I think sometimes there is no all encompassing answer. You need to find what works for your child. There are many configurations out there for educating a child on the autism spectrum. The school district needs to make a concerted effort to find which one fits your son. it is their obligation and his legal right to be placed appropriately.
HUGS
Ugh.... that has to be frustrating (and what I'll be up against in a few years). I used to teach language arts in a 6th grade integrated classroom and I had zero training with kids with special needs, but I knew who they were in that classroom and I dealt with them appropriately (as in, this one needs more time, ok... I can help with that. This one needs it explained 17 times.. ok). I cannot understand that if I without any training can handle that, that someone who HAS special ed training can overlook that because he "looks normal". Ugh.
I suppose these are the same people who give me that "what a bad parent" look in the supermarket when my daughter has a meltdown.
In the end I guess I question whether it is fair to insist on inclusion and mainstreaming.
Thank you for adding this statement into your post; it gives me that opening to express concerns from an educator's viewpoint. I teach students with autism and other developmental disabilities in a self-contained classroom in a public middle school. I also am the grandparent of a 15-year-old girl on the spectrum.
Education has become a high stakes game in our country. A district's access to public funds depends on the perceived success of their students based on scores on curriculum-based tests. A teacher's job may depend on the ability of her students to pass this test, regardless of the student's disability. Mainstream classrooms with 25 or more students may not be the best placement for students on the spectrum; many parents don't want to hear that their child on the spectrum does not fit into a mainstream classroom, but in truth, their child's educational needs could be better met in a more restrictive academic environment (i.e. grade level curriculum provided in a classroom more equipped to meet the sensory needs of the student on the autism spectrum). The quirks that come with autism can be extremely difficult to manage in the best of circumstances; as the parent of a child with autism, you face those challenges every day at home, a safe loving environment where they still have melt downs.
A self-contained classroom does not have to mean access to a less demanding academic curriculum. Mainstreaming will not make a child less autistic. It's easy to blame the teacher, the school. But really, the educational system overall is not designed to meet the needs of these kids. We need systemic change. But as we all know, change is difficult.
When I was a kid we didn't have autism spectrum disorders. I got through school because I was in a very disciplined boarding school with a fixed routine and highly committed teachers who let me away with nothing. Had my autism been worse I just would not have been allowed to remain in my school.
Personally I believe mainstreaming has very positive benefits both for the pupil and his peers but it would be unfair to enforce it to the detriment of others. A great deal of sensitivity is required to make it work, understanding and suitable adaptations. If mainstreaming is not going to work for a child there is no shame in turning to a suitable alternative until such time as mainstreaming can be tried again.
Bottom line - do whatever it takes to give your child a good education and as normal a life as possible.
You said what I have wanted to say over and over. Good job!