Tuesday, 02 February 2010
-
Would I Accept a Cure for Autism?
On nearly every Asperger Syndrome support forum I’ve seen out there, people are discussing a possible cure to autism. Of course, whether or not people would want a cure may depend on the severity of their condition. For example…someone with Low Functioning Autism may be more interested in a cure than someone with High Functioning Autism. To say that a cure is unnecessary is really overgeneralizing and could be considered insulting because of this fact.So, would I want a cure ? To put it simply, Yes. Definitely. I cannot stop wondering, “How would my life be without AS? I could still be in school – getting an education. I’d have friends.” They are the two things I long for the most. Friendship and education. I just want to be normal. I don’t want to be different. Why can’t I just be like everyone else, and actually enjoy living? I’d give so much just to have one or two real friends.
It may seem selfish of me, but why wouldn’t I want to have a social life? It’s not fair. And I know. Life isn’t fair. But people shouldn’t blame me for not being perfect. I should stop blaming myself.
Would you want a cure? There are so many people that don’t. Because they’re happy with who they are. I wish I could share that feeling.
RecommendRelated Posts
Post a Comment
- Back to autisable's Autisable Site!
- Note: your comment will appear in autisable's local time zone: GMT -05:00 (Eastern Standard - US, Canada)
About the Author
-
- From: mikkyh
- Name: Michael
- Location: United Kingdom
Stats: This Week All Time Posts: 0 12 Views: 0 5966 Comments: 0 67 View all posts by mikkyh
Comments (13)
If I had AS, then I say yes I would want a cure. But I think if people don't want to be friends with you now the way you are then why should you be friends with them anyways even if you did get cured?
@chelseanataliex@xanga - And while that's great in theory, that's not how life goes. Other parents don't understand why you never have time for anything else besides therapy appointments, IEP appointments, regular doctor's appointments, etc., unless they have a child with AS as well. So slowly they stop being your friends - simply because of the time factor.
I would absolutely accept a cure for AS. My daughter is still on the low end of the spectrum, but I wish that I wouldn't have to explain why she is the way she is. And I wish that she would have a relatively normal life, without all these extra things.
@Morningstarrising@xanga - I can understand that. But I still think if they are a true friend then they will be there always, even if it is hard. I know if it is something to do with their parents then that cannot be helped, but if it is to do with the kid/teen then I think that they weren't a true friend in the first place. Also I think an adult could be more understanding of people with AS and they could be friends with someone with AS.
@chelseanataliex@xanga - Oh, yes, absolutely you are correct. I am speaking primarily as a parent of someone with autism (obviously). I can totally see your point of view... I want my child to have friends that are both AS and NT (neurotypical), and yes, if they are true friends, they will stick by her.
@Morningstarrising@xanga - Yes, I guess you would know a lot more about this than me though because obviously you are a mother to a daughter who has AS and I don't even know anyone who has AS, let alone have a daughter with it. Yes, exactly. :)
You're right, it's different based on the severity. Would I want a cure for my child? Sure,if it made his life easier and better. Of course, I want him to have friends and to be able to navigate social situations better and easier. Of course, I want his sensory issues to be gone. Who wouldn't? Great article!
You don't need a cure to have friends or a social life. You just have to decide that you are stronger than the symptoms of AS. Go out and do life anyway.
@chefpenny - I have a whole host of interesting sensory issues. I would not want to cure them. Why? Because I have learned to control them and even use some of them to my advantage.
The friends I have are all over the place. I have one who is partially deaf and is off the wall crazy, probably a bit of an Aspie, though he'd never admit it. We have talked about everything from quantum theory to God to life on mars. I have one that is an artist who is pretty much "normal" as far as I understand what "normal" is. We talk about life, our kids, our families, politics, religion, etc. My husband is pretty much NT. We have had our share of battles as the result of misunderstandings and irritation with each other's differences. We talk about everything.
Then there are people that I know by sight. I know their names. I know where to expect to see them. We can have a pleasant (aka pointless) conversation about trivial (aka irrelevant) matters. Would I call them friends? Yes... but only because they don't fall into the category of "enemy." Things with these people are kept on a surface level. I act "normal" (as normal as I can anyway) around them. I have a script of things that are "safe" for talking about with them. Pretty much a lot of nothing.
A conversation with one of them might go:
Them: "Hi, how are you?"
Me: "Hey. I'm alright." (I usually forget to ask how they are... partly because I'm not anymore interested in how they are than they are in how I am.)
Them: "How's school?"
Me: "It's going. Got lots to do, you know?" (Here I might actually try to tell them what that lots entails, but it usually is met with a nod and a smile of complete indifference followed by distraction.)
If I remember to ask how things are with them, there might be a slightly longer exchange. Usually this takes place at church or out in the parking lot of my apartment complex.
The others have seen the "real" me that is off the wall, can't sit still to save my life, and says things that are totally outrageous. They're the ones who know my opinions about things. I usually try to keep things to myself with most other people. Then there are the people on facebook who know me pretty well because of my status updates that often contain "flammable material." It's fun to spark off interesting discussions online... more so than it is in person.
I have a pretty good friend who has AS, and he manages his condition just fine. He doesn't complain about not having friends, because he's able to manage his condition to the point where one really can't tell that he even is an Aspie. It's only noticeable to people who've known him for a while, or if he says something about it.
As a father of a high functioning autistic boy, I am not sure my 6 yo can have an opinion. I have to say yes to a cure. I would want him to have the opportunity to choose the life he wants. He did not pick to be autistic - he just has to live with it.
People who say that someone with Aspergers manages their condition well and wouldn't want a cure should ask the person. Its hard to watch oneself all the time in conversation and have one or two friends who think you are ok because you are reining yourself in when the rest of the world thinks you are weird. No one should presume to decide that for anyone else.
I have Aspergers and NO I don't want a cure. I am not ill. I am who I am and were I not some of the bad things in my life might never have been but neither would the things precious to me like my wife, daughter and grandchildren. It might be nice for parents not to have to cope with an AS child but the child may think otherwise. My life is my life and I will live it as I choose. I did not choose to be born with aspergers but I do choose to live with it.
To me it is a no brainer....I would totally want a cure for my son's Autism. Life is hard enough that I don't wany my son to have the added challenge of Autism. He is a wonderful boy and I feel that he is trapped by his Autism.
Thank you for your openness and honesty.