Saturday, 28 November 2009
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Brett's Smile Saved My Life
I'm only 16 years old. I haven't lived long. A few weeks ago, I lost all hope. In life, in everything.I decided I was going to kill myself.
I wrote a note and in that note there was one person who dominated all topics. His name is Brett. And he is the reason I am alive.
Brett is a 17 year old boy, living with severe autism, and he is my best friend. I met him in school. We had gym class together, and I immediately connected with him. Though he couldn't answer all my questions, and often repeated what I said, I knew he understood every word. I fell in love with working with him, and any time something went wrong I would find a way to be around him.
When I decided I was going to kill myself, I started the note. I wrote to all my family members and friends. Then, I decided I needed to write something to Brett. I wrote more for him than anyone else, even my own mother. I realized how much I need him, and love him, and how much he needs me. I left my house in the middle of the night and began walking down the street to think. I didn't get far before I sat down to contemplate going through with "it" or not. A few minutes later my mother had come outside and found me. She took me to the hospital.
I spent four days there. All I could think about was how much I missed Brett. As soon as I got home and got back in school, I found Brett and gave him the biggest hug I've ever given him. I laughed as he repeated the word "hug" in his monotone voice over and over. I nearly cried. I could't believe how much it meant to see his smiling face again.
It has been about 2 weeks since I got out of the hospital. Everyday, Brett has been my happiness and sanity. I have taken him out to eat, and talked to his mother about babysitting as much as possible.
I never imagined myself, at 16 years old, having a best friend who couldn't do simple multiplication, or read the word ceiling without asking for help. I also never imagined someone, who wasn't able to do those things, capable of being the one person who understands me most. The person I love more than anything.
Many people see autism as a burden. To you, I say this: It is a blessing.
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About the Author
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- From: SAMANTHaaH_x3@xanga
- Name: Sam
- About Me: I'm Sam, I'm 15. I love life.
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Comments (24)
Love, you haven't lived long and the roughest few years of your life are nearly past now. Truly things get better as you move into adulthood and take more control of your life such as driving your own car, having your own apartment, earning your own money, making decisions that don't involve family, and so on. Hang in there, and I see a future for you in helping autistic and Aspergers' people. Even if that doesn't come to pass, I see a lot of love in you that is badly needed by others and they will reciprocate. There's a place in the world that only you can fill.
Please work closely with your doctor to get through the next few years. Once past that, you'll be able to face challenges of life with a lot greater gumption and ability to meet challenges and realize that life is a lot more real than it is now.
This made me smile.
that was very touching
its great that people can actually change someone's life entirely I love that you found the good in someone and it kept you going in life :) it sounds to me as brett probably wouldn't be able to live without you eitherAll hail Brett. He must have a wonderful smile.
Well done for overcoming your darkest hour, and thank you to Brett, who has unknowingly saved a life, what a hero he is
To you I say,life isn't always easy, but it's much better to live it than not, there is a whole world of experiences out there that you can find, you wouldn't have half as much fun lying in the ground xxx
I can only imagine that your friendship means a lot to Brett as well. This is a great thing for both of you
Hope you are doing well these days. I did not see any posts on the linked blog.
I am right there with you. I used to babysit a little girl with autism. I started when she was...i think just turned 5, and couldn't speak in full sentences. She's now nearly 10, and she's grown so much. I haven't babysat her regularly in probably 2 year, but I go over and visit every so often. Though I helped her read and write and add, she's totally taught me more than I could have ever taught her. She's so fun loving and the simplest things in life make her so incredibly happy. Others always say what a shame it is that she's autistic, but she's so much better than any other child without disabilities.
Keep your head up. I know 16 is a hard age, and high school pretty much sucks. But Brett needs you, and I know he'll be able to help you through your toughest moments.
:] keep your head up. Life is all how you look at it. Find different outlets and safe spots that you can go to. Obviously, Brett is one of those places. The more safe spots, the easier life becomes. Best of luck to you!
This was so beautiful, it made me cry.
I know exactly what you meant by how his smile saved your life. Last year, I was supposed to be hospitalized for suicide and depression, but I haggled my way out of it... Fortunately though, I met people who changed my life over the summer.
I went to summer camp for the first time, and the most inspiring day was what the camp calls Girl's Day and Boy's Day, where each gender separates and we do activities that are suitable. At one point we had a reflection circle, and I shared my story with everyone, who all broke into tears with me. My pain was no longer just my own, for everyone else understood and cared. Afterwards, people came up to me, that I had yet to speak with, and they hugged me, telling me I was the strongest person they'd ever met, and how I was an inspiration.
You, and Brett, both inspire me as well.A smile is not only worth a thousand words, its also worth a life.
Be strong,Bre
aw that was so amazing <3
What a touching story. It's great that you found a reason and will to live. =] Hopefully things will get better. That's a good lesson...there are always people there who care for you and a friend's loving smile is the best thing. Yey for Brett..and you for promoting acceptance and understanding of autism rather than avoidance, hate and misunderstanding. Keep smiling.
touching....it really puts a perspective on life in general. I understand how you feel.
That was an amazing story. He's lucky to have found a friend like you, and you're quite lucky yourself to have found a friend like him it seems. :]
Looks more like a story about a person who was in the right place at the right time than about how autism is a blessing. But to each his/her own.
That made me smile. I don't have autism as severe as he does, but it's a pleasure to know that there are people in the world who treasure those who have it, no matter how severe, and see it as a blessing. I'm glad that he can make you smile.
You haven't lived long enough, but I would say you've lived long enough to realize the simpler things in life my dear.
I can't agree that Autism is a blessing- it's too broad a statement. Maybe it's different for me because it's my siblings who are autistic and not a kid at school.
My younger brother and sister are both severely autistic. My sister's autism causes her to have self-harming tendancies and she throws horrible tantrums. No medication helps, really, and they've made her badly overweight which is one side-affect of the meds she's on.
If she weren't Autistic she probably wouldn't hurt herself and wouldn't be so heavy, but at the same time, neither of these kids care when people are talking about them. When people talk about me, I get upset. But they have no clue- well, maybe they do, but they certainly don't care. And they're both so innocent, without a mean bone in their bodies. I love them both dearly, but you'd have to see my sister's tantrums and self- harm. It's horrific, from a family member's standpoint. My brother doesn't do that, but he can't communicate either. Not really.
So. I don't know. 'Autism is a blessing'? I think not. Not in most cases, anyway. This boy sounds less severe than he's made out to be. He can't do multiplication? My brother can't count past ten and only knows his house number, not the rest of his address. He can't spell ceiling? Neither can I. And my sister can't say the words "macaroni and cheese" correctly. She's fourteen, he's ten. So. Brett is only representing a less severe part of the spectrum, in my opinion.
Also, if he's attending school with you and not severe enough to be in a more specialized school, he's not as severe as you think. My sister and brother don't go to a typical school, they go to a school for the disabled, and my sister will be going to a group home in a couple years. So I'm not saying that Brett isn't inspiring, but maybe his kind of autism could be called a blessing-- not my siblings'.
it is a sweet story though.
wow. this is real touching. good thing you gave killing yourself a second thought.
hope everything is well with you now.
and i am reall happy to know that there are people out there in the world that dont see autism as a burden. A lot of people have a negative feeling towards them and treat them badly and it hurts me inside when that happpens. i mean its not their fault they are like that.
im only couple years older than you, and honestly i cannot say that i have been through the things you have but i did go through pretty harsh times and i still am, but all in all, you have to carry on out with it even if you feel like giving up. <3 so good luck with everythingg! and hope you and Brett make good memories for the future!
That was beautiful.
I'm glad you didnt really go through with it, because there are really things/people out there that gives us a good reason to keep moving forward.
sweet story, but I wouldn't say autism is a blessing.
i worked with kids with autism they are people as well. some of them are more severe then others but i am glad your friend brought you out of your situation just keep thinking of that smile :)
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11/30/2009 12:12 AM
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Opal1016@xanga
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Your smile is beautiful, keep your head up.
I wish I could find a Brett of my own. I'm very happy that you have found yours.
what a cute story. i have a brett in my life also, and he does the same thing for me under different circumstances.
This was very sweet and heartfelt. I'm glad that you didn't go through with killing yourself, even if it sounds more like you didn't truly have a chance. This may sound corny, but it is true, suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. Even if the problem(s) do not necessarily seem temporary. I've contemplated suicide before, but not gone through with it. No one ever knew that I was thinking about it. I'm glad I decided not to do it, though. :)
Your life is worth so much, even if it doesn't always seem like it. And you seem like such a beautiful and caring person. The world needs more people like that. :)
I'm glad you have Brett in your life, too. :) You're lucky to have each other. ^_^
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