Thursday, 24 September 2009
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Challenge Them To Be Challenged
I don’t know if it’s the struggles that are coming forth in Daniel’s pubescent years or just my mind wandering but lately all the memories of the early years of his bumpy ride through autism are flooding my brainI distinctly remember his first official IEP meeting and the intimidation I felt entering the windowless room with the long utilitarian table. Seated at this table where all the decision makers, each presuming they knew more than I what was best for their newest patient.
Daniel was not speaking yet so all I could think of was communication, communication, communication but they kept insisting that I come up with goals like shoe tying, using a spoon properly or jumping on one foot 5 times without toppling over. It dawned on me that the process was geared towards presenting statistical data that would show progress rather than tackling the bigger and more daunting issues facing my son.
OK then, If the APE teacher insisted on making Daniel jump up and down then we would insist that he count in some way while he did so or be required to hand her the PECS card for a reward after completing the task. If he was to grasp that spoon correctly for the OT then we would put a preferred food in the bowl and require him to request it in some way before working on any “proper grip” issues. Daniel needed a clear and affective form of communication and to expand on what he had learned through picture exchange. His communication was of the utmost importance and it needed to be incorporated into every possible trial throughout his day.
It is very easy to be intimidated when you are struggling and vulnerable, especially in the early stages of what I will call the “process” but before you enter that big conference room think long and hard about what achievements will make the biggest positive impact in your child’s life. Have those goals positioned steadfastly in your brain and stick to your resolve then enter with confidence and challenge those in the room to be challenged.
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About the Author
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- From: P1AutismMom
- Name: Nancy
- About Me: I am busy raising my 2 boys, Brian 16 and Daniel 14 who has autism. My hope in life is to make at least 2 people smile every day and if I'm feeling really ambitious I'll try to make them laugh :) You can follow me on twitter http://twitter.com/P1AutismMom
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Comments (3)
I wish every parent could read your story in enough time before their first IEP meeting to be prepared as you describe. I was a special education teacher who was an advocate for your kids in a school. I would always send home an outline for parents to do, long before the meeting. In doing it they would have identified what they thought were strengths and needs and what they wanted addressed in the IEP. The table didn't seem quite so big and intimidating then! I don't know about there but where I live parents can bring people to the meeting, folks who have been working with their child outside the school, it is supportive for you and your child!
As you probably know, it is often very hard to change an IEP after it is done and before the set review date. Although I believe the law would say this can happen at your request, wouldn't it? When I was an early interventionist I made sure parents had the government documentation re IEPs long before they would be going to the school. Maybe this is something preschools could do for parents of special needs children.
BRAVO for you to insist that communication be a priority! Schools need more speech pathologists. Our autism consultants are speech pathologists. Some very insightful people hired them!
@jeannicol - Oh yes! Speech people are great!! Only had one that I had to tell she'd get better results if she used dinosaurs instead of the zoo animals that he could care less about.
The worst part abuot the public schools in So Cal right now is the union. Seriously messing things up when your kid finally has a great aide in the class and she gets bumped by someone with more seniority. The replacement may be someone who knows about autism or could even be someone who is frightened by dissabled kids but she needs the hours so she takes the job out of desparation. It's absolutely sinful and it happens all the time. They say there is nothing they can do about it so last year was the first year I fought for non-public placement. I won, actually Danny won and is now thriving in this much more results driven environment.
They start talking to him the minute he comes through the door until he is ready to go home and then he has to listen to me. ha
Thanks for taking the time to read my post and for your comments.
I had a constant battle over the last couple of years of primary school with my daughter's school about communication. Previous to this, she has responded to PECS really well, and had gained a few simple spoken words from it too. So obviously, I was keen for this to continue. Unfortunately, the teacher she was moved to wasn't concerned at all. I had meetings, I asked for referrals to speech therapy, I commented in her home/school journal that I would like to see the PECS cards they were currently working on (even though I knew they weren't) to try to force the issue. Nothing was done, and this was in a special needs school! When I discussed it with their speech therapist, she said that 'she didn't work with children she couldn't make a difference to'. I was shocked and appalled that she could make this blase remark about my child!
When she was due to go into secondary education, I realised that the same speech therapist was working there, and it was one of many reasons I appealed for funding for her to go to a specialist autism school. It took time, but I was successful and she has progressed more in the last year than she did in the last 4 years of primary school. I don't want my child filling in statistic criterias if her basic needs aren't being met, sometimes these schools have odd priorities and it makes me mad.