Tuesday, 11 August 2009
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Stupid Rules Normal people follow - Part 1 of 5
[Note: I'm using the word "normal" in this post. Those who are not normal—myself included—should not take offense; I am using this term in the mathematical sense of "near the mean of a normal distribution," as in within one standard deviation of the mean; in the context of cognition another word is "neurotypical," but this is less common and less general, and many people are unfamiliar with its meaning. In the vast majority of possible systems, most will be normal and some will not. It's nearly inevitable. See also Stupid Rule 4, for our fear of being "abnormal" is very much a Stupid Rule.]
Introduction
A major part of what makes life difficult for those who are rational, especially those on the autism spectrum, (in the interests of full disclosure: I'm on the near end, just shy of Asperger's Syndrome) is the fact that normal people follow certain rules on most occasions, rules that don't really make sense—but that we all are expected to follow, because otherwise it forces us to confront issues that we feel more comfortable avoiding. They are all stupid rules, rules that are rationally difficult or impossible to justify; but they are universally present and strongly enforced, and we ignore them only at our own peril. Perhaps we ought to challenge them, find the places to attack them that will most weaken their grip upon humanity—but we cannot be sure to win such a fight, and we certainly cannot simply pretend it is already won.
Stupid Rule 1: Animals and their bodies are dirty—especially when it comes to humans.
This covers a wide variety of behaviors, from the universal prohibition on nose-picking to the fact that men aren't supposed to talk at urinals. It's also why people don't like to be looked at in the shower, why masturbation is not to be performed in public, why one is expected to chew with the lips closed, and why blood is not an appropriate topic for dinner conversation. Anything that reminds us of our animal nature—bodily substances such as blood, saliva, mucus, entrails, urine, feces, skin, hair; and especially the fundamental forces of animality itself, sex, disease, and death—makes people uncomfortable. Eating is less troublesome, but not completely immune, and hence there are many strange taboos about eating that vary across cultures. (Consider "Don't put ketchup on your ice cream." It's actually more nutritious that way, so if you like the taste, why not? Because that's not how you do it. It's a taboo.) Sleeping and breathing appear to be exceptions, perhaps because breathing must be done literally constantly and sleeping is similar enough to "clean," non-animal phenomena like nightfall and machine shutdown. Sex, disease, and death are also somewhat appealing to us, especially sex, for two reasons: We are, in fact, animals, and we have animal drives built into our brains; and most people find things that are forbidden appealing simply because they are forbidden. These may in fact be mutually-reinforcing phenomena: If sex weren't forbidden, would the forbidden still be sexy? Even if it would, would it be as sexy as it is now?
The normal behavior is therefore to avoid these topics whenever possible, but when they do come up—usually in private, or with close friends—to laugh and joke about them in order to defuse the tension. If you ever wondered why everyone giggles during sex education, this is why. It's also why most of the really funny jokes are so-called "dirty jokes," about sex, disease, and death.
Plants and fungi appear to be largely exempt, which is why it's "animals" and not "lifeforms." No one is disgusted or scandalized when we talk about sap, seeds, or spores, but nearly all are when we talk about blood or sperm, even insect blood or horse sperm. Bacteria may also count as "animals" under this rule, or, since people react so strongly to bacteria even when they wouldn't react to animals, they may be a separate Stupid Rule 1A: Bacteria are really, really dirty. And lest you think this latter is rational: Roughly 99% of all bacteria are harmless to humans, and the dominant species of bacteria on Earth is a strain of E. coli that we and most other mammals absolutely need for survival.
Do you think this rule is true?
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About the Author
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- From: pnrj@xanga
- Name: Patrick
- Location: Ann Arbor, Michigan, United States
- About Me: I suppose I might as well begin with the mundane. I finished my bachelor's degree in cognitive science in December 2010 from the University of Michigan in Ann Arbor. I was born in 1988. I have two cats, Dot and Tootsie (my other cats, Shadow and Fila, and my gecko, Fhloston, are now deceased.) I write, I study, I live, I learn, I love. I am a complex, creative, and interdisciplinary individual, as my blog will clearly show.
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Comments (63)
I think ALL RULES are stupid, period, end of story. There should be no rules.
this post made me giggle especially the fungi sex part. I don't think I will ever be able to talk about plant or fungal reprodcution again without wanting to laugh.
I readily admit that some of my rules are irrational, but they are my personal rules not normal rules.
HA! This was funny... but oh so true. I think you're right.
@abilene_piper_lg@xanga - So then, do you want to make a rule that there should be no rules?
My cat isn't dirty. Well, i mean she fell in the toilet but I cleaned her up and bathed her. Even before then, she wasn't really dirty. She sits on my dinner table, I don't have a problem with it. She seems to keep herself quite clean. My dog, well, he plays rough outside and gets dirty but I always groom him so he's more clean than a usual dog would be.
Humans can't possibly be dirty! We have so many organisms that stay with us at all times to keep us clean!!! Which also includes mites and bacteria =).
Read the first two paragraphs and got bored. Lame.
Also, why do I keep seeing autism topics on xanga o_O There are other problems in the world too. I don't give a fuck about autism or autistic people more or less than anyone else
@abilene_piper_lg@xanga - agree!
It's true, but some of the grosser bodily functions are avoided because if everyone was burping, farting, picking their noses, touching their own feces or bleeding whenever it would be chaotic, not healthy and yes, gross.
*yawn*
Okay see now, catsup on ice cream just sounds horrifically gross, but then I hate the stuff anyway (not ice cream, that's just delicious!). I personally dunno why you'd put catsup on... anything! I've never heard of any food combinations being "taboo" though. If you like it, then eat it. Whatever. No big. Hell, I eat fish, pizza and random slices of bread dipped in a bit of ranch dressing. They're also delicious with honey BBQ sauce. OM NOM.
And, as it is, most animals are far cleaner than human beings any day. They don't eat preservatives, chemicals, and other junk on a daily basis. And have you seen how often cats clean themselves?! If it was showering, they'd be doing it about 5 times a day! Bet a lot of people here can't even hold to one shower a day... :P
i wouldn't call this a stupid rule since it can affect peoples' health. for example: if dogs held the same regard for feces we humans hold, a dog with intestinal parasites wouldn't be such a threat to the animal community. but since they go around sticking their noses in it and chewing it up, one dog can spread parasites all over the place without even trying. and while most bacteria is harmless, i don't think it's irrational to take precautions to avoid the few that are.
as for sex, i would prefer it be kept private. if for no other reason than the fact that i wouldn't want to be that desensitized to it. i wouldn't want it to be less enjoyable than it is now.
some people take these things to extreme levels. but not most. and these certainly aren't stupid concepts.
@deadlyelixir@xanga - right. where's the cancerish website? cancer is a way bigger problem. of course, most of them die off, so i guess there's no point in giving them a site they'll barely get to use.
@TheMANinTHEyellowHAT@xanga - One thing you should understand about the Xanga universe: What exists on Xanga is what people put on Xanga. If you want to start Cancerish, or whatever else, you are entirely free to do so. It turns out that enough people on Xanga were concerned about autism to create Autisable; there was no coercion involved in this process.
@pnrj@xanga - don't tell it to me, tell it to the person who actually had the complaint. i was just messin around.
@TheMANinTHEyellowHAT@xanga -
@pnrj@xanga -
Uh...what? A lot of people die from cancer, but a lot of people also survive with it. I don't think it would be an exaggeration to say that everyone has been affected by cancer in some way...either they've had it, someone they know have had it, or someone who knows someone they know has had it. I've never known anyone autistic. The chance of discovering the cure to cancer is probably very small on xanga, but a "Cancerish" website would be much more helpful and I'm sure a lot more people could relate.
It's simply annoying when I see at least one blog about autism as I look through the featured weblogs. Oh well, whatever. Autism/you are nothing of my concern. I'm more shocked at how much people care about the topic. A kid has autism..so what?
@deadlyelixir@xanga - no i know what you're sayin. it's not just xanga. autism seems to have just become a hot topic in the world today. not that i don't care about people who are affected by it. but i also don't think it warrants the attention i see paid to it.
of course, what do i know? i work with non-primates all day.
@deadlyelixir@xanga - your a bitch if you dont like it dont comment on it, damn and i dont give a fuck about skanks but they seem to be everywhere too.. i honestly think hes right. humans carry more bacteria on them they we realize and so many topics are considered taboo. just like the makeup your skankass is wearing used to be taboo but so many people wear it it is no longer, just like sex its becoming public so no one really considers it too much taboo, but is this a good thing?
@NewMommie101@xanga - The hell you talking about, Fat Chick? Fuck you. I'll say what I want, and I'll tell the truth. I think you're fat and ugly, for example, with offense. I'll voice my opinion on whatever I want, things I like and don't like, if I feel like it. I'm a skank? LOL. I don't see how you've determined from a few comments from me on a public blog that I'm a skank. Makeup? Does wearing makeup make someone a "skank?" Hmm a lot of people in the world, both females and males, must be skanks then, based on your logic! :D. You just sound so smart. I don't study the history of makeup so I have no idea what you mean by "taboo" LOL. You mean it was looked down upon or something? Caring about what other people think about you is overrated and for the weak. I don't care about what your fat ass or anyone else thinks about me, so I will do as I want. I have no idea what you mean by "sex its becoming public" or how it's relevant to this. Do you mean people having sex in public? Do you mean the content of sex showing up in the media? I don't really care about either one of these things though. Maybe you do, lol, but I don't care about anything concerning you either. If someone is having sex in public and it bothers you so much, report them for public indecency? If it's the second one, then I'd just like to say sex is a natural thing, although I have no particular interest in sex. I don't see the logic behind being so "embarrassed" to talk about anything relating to sex. It's a process that has kept the human species from going extinct. Penis, vagina, testicles, uterus, and? What's the big deal? Not sure what you mean by "good thing" either. Good or bad is a matter of opinion anyways, it's not a fact. Think all you want, and see how many people actually care. Lol.
Rules about masturbating in public and chewing with your mouth closed don't exist to allow us to avoid our nature as animals. I'm perfectly comfortable with my nature as a primate and I still don't want to see most people naked. They're just not that easy on the eyes.
Some things just are not pleasant to view, according to the majority, period. So we have these rules.
If you don't agree with the social mores of a culture you can always distance yourself from it.
@deadlyelixir@xanga - you are such a dumb cunt its not even funny, get a life, bitch and im not fat im pregnant. and before you go off into a tangent about i'm the whore ladida like the dumb bitch you are would do, no im not im married and having a baby, so take your dumb skank ass and jump off a building the world would be a better place with out people like you in it.
@NewMommie101@xanga - Oh really? Why do you feel that I'm such a "dumb cunt?" What have I said to make you feel this way? Elaborate and give supporting evidence plz. It just restores my faith in humanity so much when someone thinks another person is dumb because they disagree with them or because they've been insulted. Haha, if there's a "dumb cunt" between the two of us, it's you, Fat Chick. I think you're fat and ugly; I've also given my opinions on this topic. And? What does that equate to? What you're saying about me is based on assumptions. Also, I'm not the person who's using a bunch of "insult words" in badly structured sentences. I can only think that you feel this way because you don't like what I say, and that's very amusing. LOL
I couldn't care less about the state of your womb. It makes no difference to me, you still appear to be fat to me. And ugly. :)
"and before you go off into a tangent about i'm the whore ladida like the dumb bitch you are would do"- Oh really, you can predict what someone would say? Dang, I didn't know you had such supernatural powers. Why haven't you been all over the news? It saddens me [lol not rly] to think that your pathetic genes will be passed on and added to the cess pool part of society. If you want the world to be a "better place," then you should hope your fetus dies before it would otherwise pop out of your fish cunt. Or come out covered in blood from the cuts of your pudgy stomach. Lol.
This rule doesn't exist in my family. We talk about whatever happens to come up, including all those lovely bodily functions. Even at the dinner table. Although my brother will sometimes get up and walk away if my mom, sister, and I start talking about sex or menstruation. Haha.
yeah, my cat is the cleanest creature ever. he bathes himself 23.5 hours out of the day